Today I write about something close to my heart
Today I write about something from the past
Today is my father’s death anniversary
It’s a story of great loss and grief
And part of a story of strength and life
Many years ago, on the night of his passing
My dad and I were watching late night shows on TV
And it got really late and I yawned multiple times
He noticed and told me to go to sleep
My family usually hug each other good night and that’s what he did
After that, I went to bed and slept
I woke quite suddenly to my mum’s shaking and calling
“Your daddy just passed away”
I was in shock
I couldn’t move
“Quickly get up and bath and change clothes”
“For what?” I asked
“We have to go out later…”
I got up and crept outside to the sight of my dad on the floor
Unmoving…
I was so shocked, I didn’t know what to do…
I just stood there, memories flashing
Tears flowing
Just last night, we hugged good night
And now he was gone…
During the wake, I was in a state of disbelief
Yes the facts were right in front of my eyes
Yet I could not believe it
This led me to keep my grief from his sudden death inside my mind and heart
My results dwindled down
I didn’t study at all
I had “no mood”
I was in a state of denial
I escaped from reality by playing games
Before I knew it, time flew so fast
And little did I know until much later that I was in depression
Back then, I didn’t know and did not seek help
I suffered miserably during that time
And now, I am sharing because it is his anniversary
And a reminder to myself
That yes he is dead, and I am still alive
And learning my skills has enabled me to overcome that loss and grief
It has enabled me to find an inner strength
It has enabled me to grow and learn
One of the key, was to seek help and not suffer in silence
I suffered in silence and it was a miserable number of years, believe you me
My version of seeking help was to spend thousands of dollars on education and training and courses
Namely Neuro Linguistic Programming and Hypnosis and Hypnotherapy
And subsequently using such skills to help myself
Naturally it worked very well
Just need a lot of time, effort and money
Now I don’t know if this will mean anything to you
But if you know someone suffering in silence
Unable to overcome loss and grief
And just feeling sad or “no mood” everyday
Whether you know someone or you too, find some similarities
Seek help
At least find a friend to talk to
And if you need to
Or can’t find anyone
You can talk to me
My dad taught me many things
And I’m sure yours did too
So you know what to do, don’t you?
Thanks dad for everything
