9 Ways To Fail Being Hypnotized In Therapy

Presentation Lee McKing and fail to be hypnotized

Ok this might be a strange topic to talk about but it serves a couple of purposes

Because yes, sometimes there are people who are unable to be hypnotized for the purpose of therapy for a period of time

So sharing such reasons help one to understand oneself

That’s the main thing

Think of it as a reflection with regards to the issue at hand

And so when you reflect upon yourself, if you have at least one of those factors, then you know this is something that you might want to resolve as well

Or perhaps you have a friend who failed to be hypnotized, so maybe you can understand them better too

Then again, some of the reasons are applicable for therapy, like why therapy didn’t work for someone especially after months or years

Alright, let’s get into it proper

1. You are in denial

This is huge!

If you are in a state of denial of an issue, it means you deny the existence of the issue

You do not see the issue, or you do not acknowledge the issue

Based on that, you will realize that you cannot solve the issue

Because if you do not see it nor acknowledge it, how will you know the right steps to resolve it?

Like if there is a hole in the floor of your house and you pretend it doesn’t exist, you deny the hole is there

You might walk around it, or jump over it and everything seems fine now

But over time, maybe mold grows in the hole, or it fills up with junk, or maybe the hole gets bigger for some reason

And you can’t solve it if you don’t want to admit it is there, isn’t it?

That’s why denial is a big problem

In some cases, the issue you are in denial of is something small, in other cases, it could be big and potentially life-changing

So what if you are in a state of denial?

How do you get out?

Firstly, do some reflection and get other people to tell you what they think of yourself and/ or your issues

This can be friends, therapists, counsellors etc

But here’s the thing, if they are saying some common themes, then before you deny or disagree with them, I want you to consider maybe this is the truth

Just that you are currently in denial of the truth

Of course, if you just trust one or two people, you don’t have to ask an entire group about it

And please pick people who can be honest with you, and not just butter you up

Presentation Lee McKing and state of denial

2. You don’t want to solve the issue

Hold up, before you throw an apple at me, hear me out first

This is a general broad idea which I shall share in a moment the specifics

There are some different versions of this

First are the people who really do not want to resolve the issue

Now then you might ask, why do they seek a therapist or counsellor then?

Simplebecause other people tell them to

Essentially, they are doing so to please those people, and it’s not necessarily to resolve their issue

For such people, doesn’t matter whether it is hypnosis, therapy, counselling etc

It wouldn’t be effective

There will be a few like this, hopefully not you, but there are a few

If you know someone like that, and they do not want to resolve their issues for whatever reason

Honestly, it might sound weird but leave them be

Sure you can keep asking them to seek help and all, but at the same time, if they get defensive and don’t want to talk to you ever again, would you be ok with that?

Giving them time to themselves, perhaps until they see that their issues will cause more problems

Again, I know it sounds weird

Otherwise they can be going for years of counselling and paying a lot of money and seeing little progress

The second is your unconscious doesn’t want to resolve the issue just yet

Consciously you do want to resolve the issue!

It’s just that the unconscious mind doesn’t want to resolve the issue for some reason

And in such cases, the unconscious mind might link the issue with a benefit, which we call a secondary gain

And so, to resolve the issue, it will mean letting go of a benefit too

Which doesn’t seem right to the unconscious mind

For such cases, identifying the benefit and finding another way to achieve that benefit might help start the disconnection of that benefit to the issue

As well as doing hypnosis to disconnect it proper

I had a guy came to stop smoking because otherwise his girlfriend will leave him

He didn’t see smoking as an issue, it was his girlfriend’s problem

The hypnosis worked… for a week because he started smoking again

Another hypnosis was done so he can communicate with his unconscious mind

And he realized he want both to keep smoking and have his girlfriend at the same time!

Which is why the hypnosis wasn’t effective

A third version is that the person has a victim mentality

This is tricky, because they think of themselves as a victim and thus, have to suffer or go through multiple negative experiences

Sometimes, they might create such negative experiences for themselves, whether or not they know it

Let’s say you know someone who has a victim mentality, and even if you offer good solid advice to help them, they might turn it around and claim that you are controlling them, or you think they are of low status that need help, etc etc

And there is another version of the victim mentality, is that they use negative experiences to get attention from other people

If we repeat the above example for this version, they will be happy that you are giving them attention and advice, however they will always have new issues to come to you or say the previous advice didn’t work and the same issue persist

How can you help them if you encounter one such person?

Well, it definitely ain’t easy

If you don’t want to leave them be until they realize their own mentality is chasing people away

Then be aware that you need a lot of time and patience to support and guide them

Unless it’s the attention thing then they want your support and guidance for a long while

Like I said, it’s a bit tricky

Because hypnosis, or any therapy really, works best when they themselves want to heal

Presentation Lee McKing and being overwhelmed

3. You aren’t ready to solve the issue

So let’s say you know of an issue and you want to resolve, and yet, the hypnosis doesn’t work?

What gives?

In this case, it could be a question of time

Whether you are ready to resolve and let go, or whether has enough time been processed by your unconscious mind, in order to aid you in resolving the issues

If you just went through a breakup, and feeling terrible and all, well, that is understandable

How can one pick themselves up so easily after ending such a deep love?

Only when enough time has passed, and the self is stable within through acceptance of the situation

I had a client ask me if I can hypnotized his uncle and aunt, because their son recently committed suicide

However, the funeral of the son was just that day itself

So I told him, give them time to grief, it’s perfectly fine to grieve over the loss right now

Don’t jump into therapy just because an incident has happened

Perhaps they will get over their grief by themselves with time, but if not, I will be here

How much time is needed to pass, I have to admit, I don’t know either

This is because everyone is different, and some people can process faster, others require a bit more time

What I do know is that when the time is right, when you are ready to heal and resolve your issues

You will know it

4. You are impulsive

This is kinda similar to the above because it has a relationship with time

In this case, not enough time to think carefully whether one wants it or not

However, this impulse also links to emotions, or desires, or wants

And the issue with this is that if we do 100% to what our emotions wants, without any logical thinking or planning, we tend to put ourselves in a terrible situation

Like if you see a girl and you have a desire to kiss her, you don’t kiss her on the spot do you?

If you are impulsive and do kiss her, well you might find yourself slapped, by her hand, and with a fine

Similarly, you cannot rush into therapy

I’ve had a few clients who saw me and admit that they are impulsive people, they do what they want to do like now

They also admit that usually what they want to do will fail

Based on that, doing the hypnosis impulsively will fail too, isn’t it?

A couple of clients decided to do it anyway, and true enough, it didn’t work out

So if you know you are naturally impulsive and things mess up because of it, then slow down

Accept that some time is needed if you want an effective way to resolve your issues

It’s like the tale of the tortoise and the hare

Slowing down can help you reach your goals in a more effective way

Presentation Lee McKing and minced

5. You weren’t honest

Now this is twofold

First being you aren’t honest with yourself

It’s like you know of the issue but you decided to lie about it

Like putting a carpet over the hole in the house might make it go away or pretending it doesn’t exist

The difference between this and denial is that you know the issue

Second is that you aren’t honest with the therapist

If you don’t tell the truth, and lie to the therapist, how can they help you?

What is the point of saying things to put yourself in a better light, when the truth isn’t that?

Essentially, this is like digging a bigger hole for yourself to fall into

This is because we can’t remember the lies we tell to ourselves or to other people

So we lie to cover a lie to cover a lie to cover a lie to cover a lie

You get the picture

I’ve had clients involving at least 2 people, and they both spoke to me in private

However their stories do not match up

I had 2 parents tell me they do not argue or fight at all, while the daughter told me that her parents fight and argue every day

Who is telling the truth?

How can I help?

Tough right?

Thus, having the realization that you got to be honest with yourself first will help a lot

After that, you can start to be honest with the people around you, as well as the therapist

Being honest with yourself will be a huge step forward, seeing the good and bad of yourself can allow for effective change and healing

6. You didn’t share everything

Ok to be honest, this particular reason has the least impact in my opinion

This is because in some cases, even if you don’t share everything, it might come up during the hypnosis

So, in a few cases, not sharing everything can potentially hinder the hypnosis


Well, if you don’t share something, let’s say you choose not to talk about Issue A

Then your unconscious mind might assume that you don’t want to resolve Issue A

And thus we will not be able to enter into hypnosis to find and resolve Issue A

This is especially true if you talk about Issues B, C and D, but they are related to Issue A

And in such a case, sometimes the unconscious mind want to target to resolve Issue A but since you didn’t want to talk about it, then we can’t enter into hypnosis proper

If you want to resolve your issues, you have to know that you got to open up and share

I am unable to read your mind in what is bothering you, and especially if there are some specific details that can help you understand yourself and your issues too

Yes, I can understand where some things might be really private and personal, however if they are related to the issue you want to resolve, or other issues in your life

Then yes, please consider those details as something you will want to share eventually

That way you can get the best possible help you seek

7. You aren’t ready to forgive someone

In some cases, the issue came about as a result of what another person did unto you, whether intentionally or unintentionally

Sometimes it is completely understandable

Like perhaps you had abusive parents and thus unable to forgive them at the moment

Now perhaps, you can’t think of anything bad about your parents because they were pretty good overall

It will mean that your unconscious mind recorded something that happened, an event that was potentially traumatic and thus unable to forgive just yet

However, although I use the word traumatic, it may not be a “real trauma”

The “trauma” is seen from the child’s point of view

A cat to an adult is small, while a cat to baby is like a lion to an adult

So parents arguing might be a small thing, but it might be hella scary to the child, which might get registered as a “trauma” in the unconscious mind

Give your unconscious time to process and be ready to forgive eventually

Don’t be hard on yourself like, oh why can’t I forgive my mom for what she done for me

It’s perfectly fine to give it time

Even when you feel the urge to pee, sometimes you endure and tahan to do other things first right?

Same thing

8. You can’t handle the truth

Ok not really, just felt like putting the quote in hahahah

But yes in a way too

You can’t handle the truth, or you aren’t ready to face the truth

This links with Point 7 actually

Let’s say something did happen during your childhood and your unconscious mind registered it as a trauma

Parents had an argument and trauma is registered

Your unconscious mind will want to protect you, and in some people, it will block out those memories

Of course, this protection system has its bugs

When a memory, or traumatic event or whatever, gets blocked out

It might block that event only

Or it might block that day, or week, or month or year

I like to see the mind like a computer system

So the program to forget that trauma might also spread and you might forget many things in your childhood

Meaning to say, if you realize you got a poor memory, or especially if you can’t remember your childhood much, then yup, something might have happened that cause your unconscious mind to run this protection forgetting program

Being ready to face the past or the truth within can be scary, which can hinder the hypnosis from happening

But once you are ready, most of the time we can find it and resolve it from the root cause

Presentation Lee McKing and targeting the wrong issue

9. You target the wrong issue

This can be a bit loaded

A wrong issue being targeted might be like the above, wanting to resolve a surface issue but unable to go into the deep issues to resolve

Another version of a wrong issue can be that you mislabeled an issue and thus, target something that isn’t really an issue

Thus you will be unable to enter hypnosis to resolve the correct issue

I’ll share a case study on this

A client came to me wanting to resolve anger issue, because he has been arguing with his wife and bang the table

When we did the hypnosis, I attempted to find his emotion of anger but he couldn’t find it

So I asked him to come out of hypnosis and said that perhaps he wasn’t ready to solve the issue, but more likely he is targeting the wrong issue

I said so because he couldn’t find the emotion of anger, thus perhaps there was no anger issue to begin with

He asked me

“I argue with my wife and bang table, is that not anger?”

I shared that we cannot use behaviors to denote an emotion, you can be shouting in frustration, or banging in disappointment or even stress, it does not necessarily mean anger

The interesting thing is that as he sat with my words, something clicked in him, and his eyes automatically closed again

And to answer your question – no I didn’t hypnotize him again, yes he went into self hypnosis!

Now he is telling me, that he is feeling something heavy in his stomach and out popped a stone

This stone is from his unconscious mind, and it said to him that it represented frustration and disappointment

Later on it revealed a memory from when he was 5-6 years old, and he was frustrated and disappointed at his father for caning him for getting 9 out of 10 for spelling

That frustration and disappointment got projected onto his wife as he grew up, and was misunderstood as anger issues

As you can see from this case, it was only when he heard my views and accepted the possibility of my views

Then his unconscious mind clicked in place and revealed the true issue to him

This may seem similar to denial, yet there are differences

It isn’t really a big problem, it’s just that you are looking at the wrong thing or identified the wrong issue

You might be surprised to know how many people think they know themselves but don’t

So keep an open mind and you’ll be on your way to healing

This sums up why some people can’t be hypnotized

Eh didn’t realize it was so long to read

If you read until here, kudos to you!

Good job~

There are of course other possible reasons that a person can’t be hypnotized which maybe I’ll share in a Part 2

I decided not to put them all cause it was getting a bit long for this article hahaha

What are your thoughts after reading through?

Comment below or ask me a question on my Tiktok so I can continue to produce more content for you!

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